When a deceased family member is cremated, you have the choice of whether or not you wish to be present. Some families feel as though their presence during this event is critical, while others prefer to simply pick up the urn filled with cremated remains after the body has been cremated. If you're learning toward being present for the cremation, and you have children, your next priority is to decide whether they'll be with you, too. This is an important decision and one for which there's no universally correct decision. Asking yourself these questions may help you to decide how to proceed.
Are They Mature Enough?
There's arguably no bigger topic to ponder than the maturity level of your children when you're evaluating whether you want them to be present at the cremation of a family member such as a grandparent. Think about not only the age of each child, but of each child's maturity level. For example, one child who is 13 years of age may be mature enough to be present, while a child of 16 years of age may not be mature enough. You should also consult your children as to their wishes.
Will It Provide Closure?
Some people appreciate being present during the cremation because it can provide closure. Talk to your children about how they'll feeling in the wake of the family member's death. Disbelief is a common feeling to experience during such a traumatic event, and while this feeling can fade over time, some people continue to experience it. If one of your children is really struggling in this area and has indicated that he or she needs closure, being present during the cremation may be suitable.
Can I Provide Support?
You should always assess your own emotions during such a difficult time. You may be in a high amount of grief after losing a parent, for example, but you always need to think about supporting your children. If your grief is so strong that you don't feel as though you'd be able to offer support during the cremation, it's perhaps best for your children to not be included. Alternatively, if you're managing things all right and feel that you could support your children, their presence may be valuable. It's important to discuss this topic thoroughly with your spouse and your children alike, so that everyone can ideally come to a consensus about how to proceed.
Contact a service, like West University Cremation Services, LLC, for more help.Share